Author Topic: [F] Ice Sneezing*  (Read 8514 times)

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Offline N@ndo

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[F] Ice Sneezing*
« on: January 29, 2012, 07:00:12 PM »
This is the first time I write a story in english. Unfortunately, my english is sooooooooo bad (it always kept me from writing). I hope my english will not ruin the story.
I posted this story in the green forum, so... I hope you enjoy it.   ;D


It was a quiet day in the house. Normally, this house was a little active.

"Finally, peace! So I can make that recipe with watermelons", thought Fire the Fox. Fire the Fox is a female red fox (duh!), and also owns the house. Her friends are spending a few days at her house, and she was responsible for making the food. So has a hard time training their culinary skills. Immediately, she screamed: "Sky, go wake up Free! Tell her that lunch is almost done!". Sky is a female white angel hedgehog (yes, she has wings and a angel halo. She is in the room, watching a movie on a 52'' television. "Okay, I'm going!" - was her answer.

Free is a female ice dragoness. Why "ice dragoness"? Because she has "ice powers". Huh... and... she is sleeping in the guest room.
"Free, Wake up! The food is almost done!"
The Free answer: "I'm going", and change position in bed.
Sky closes the back door and back to the main room.

In the "Free bedroom", she begins to snore loudly, and shakes his head to find a comforting position. Thus, inside the pillow, a very little feather falls off and goes flying into the room. It goes there, it goes here ...tantric on a flight, as if dancing a beautiful song. So he took his "last step" and landed on Free's nose. With that, her nose began to feel tickled, this made the dragoness open one of his eyes. She realizes the tickling, and knows that this is not good. If she sneeze, she can expel a freezing gas, which is able to freeze anything (including a whole room).


She snort. Bad idea. The little feather enters in one of your big nostrils, tickling in it. Really, a bad idea. Free snorted more three times, it made the litthe feather go deeper in the left nostril (yes, left). She's right hand, then she can not control your left. This includes her left nostril. The little feather is touchind sensitive spots on the left depth nostril, this is not good. Her next action is rubbing her nose with your right hand, but with this, she ends up decreasing the diameter of your nostrils, allowing the feather reaches a much larger area. Tickle, tickle, tickle.


The sneeze is coming. She can control your instincts, then she closes her eyes tightly. It helps? I don't know. But your nose is increasingly wrinkled, your nostrils is flaring, flaring... the tickle is getting increasingly uncontrollable. She tries to hold her breath, but ... her sneeze level is about 6.6 and 7.5, on a scale from 0 (normal) to 10 (immediate sneezing). The suspense takes over the room. She moves her head to the right and left, tries to blow, but to no avail. The little feather is too deep.

"Aaaahhhnn... AAAAAHNN..."

At the same time in the main room:

Fire see Sky watching TV and she think Sky has not done what she had requested.
"Sky, you did not wake her (Free) up?"
"Yes, I was. She said she would wake up soon. If you want, I'll try again."
Right now, Amazon enters the room with a friend. Amazon is a brazilian female green fox, and still can not speak English. Fortunately Fire could speak Portuguese...
"Fire, eu posso usar seu quintal para treinar?"
"Sim, pode... mas não corte minhas folhas! Hmmm... quem é ele?"
"Ele é um amigo. He is... doing me to... learn... english ?
"Está errado", says the green male fox, " o correto é 'he is teaching me english'..." for Fire: "She is evolving. She is trying a few sentences. Do you have any friend who can speak in Portuguese?"
"Hmm... Free, a friend. She is sleeping in the guest room."
"Oh, I'll wake her. Já volto, Amazon. Treino, treino!"

Back in the "guest bedroom"...

Free can not handle more. Reached a critical level (9.3). She is capping her nose with her hands, but she can not avoid the inevitable. So decided not to hold more. Deep breath, close the eyes, and let the instincts take over. A cold explosion seems to happen inside the nostrils, while her face (and the flaring giant nostrils) points to the door, just when the green male fox enters the room.

"Free... wake up!"

He is your first victim.


A big explosion casts a thick layer of dust freezing toward the male fox, freezing his in time.
"Oh god, sorry", says Free, snorting.
.. but...
... the tickling is not disappeared...
... the litthe feather is still inside the flaring and tickling nostrils. And now, the sneeze level is 5.6.

"Oh my... huuuh...", she knows that it is useless to rubbing her nose. Her instincts always does her sneezing three or four times. And.. the little feather is still tickling the depth of her left nostrils...


Sky is the next to enter the room. When Free saw Sky, immediately turned away. She didn't want to freeze your friend.
"Free, you... WHAT DO YOU WANT WITH HE?? o_____o"
"Sky... huuh... please get outta here ... ahhh... I'm going to... eeeehhhh... sneeze.... aaaaahhh...", Free tried to speak, but ner tickling nostrils is trying to find an opportune moment to force her to make a long inhalation and... explode.
"Oh....... okay DX but... I want to do something ....", and then she puts a pot of melted ice cream in the frozen fox head, "I don't like melted ice cream. You can do this please? ^^", and running out of room.

The room is now completely frozen, like an ice room. Most of the objects are covered with a thin ice layer, like the most beautiful winter festival. The room temperature dropped several degrees. In this location, a ice cloud impeded a perfect view.

Here, Free frowned and swinging her nose. The tickling continued, but her instincts would only allow one more sneeze. (sneeze level: 7.7)
She prepares for the climax. (sneeze level: 8.5)
Her nostrils never flaring this way. (sneeze level: 9.0)
His whole face is wrinkled. The last time is now. (sneeze level: 9.9)


In this last and big sneeze explosion, the frozen little feather is shot from her flaring explosive nostrils with a bullet force. His splendid strength managed to break through the wall, without direction.

Fire was preparing to cut the watermelon with the quality of an international chef. But do not get it. The little "rocked" feather, uncontrollable, crossed the watermelon, causing it to explode in the Fire's face. She made a face of anger, but not had time to scream something.

Sky wanted to see a new movie, but can not. The frozed feather across the television, causing a huge explosion. BLAAAAM!!! Sky was terrified, and two seconds later, was flying from the ceiling, scared.

Amazon was focused on a new blow with her spear. But when he was doing it ... she hit the little "bullet" feather, cutting it in two. Each piece almost hit Amazon, passing beside her. Upon reaching the cement wall, caused a huge strange explosion. "Mas o quê...", was her reaction.

In ten seconds, all were in the "Free's bedroom", shouting: "FREE!  >:("
Her response: "What? Do you like the decoration?  ;D "
« Last Edit: June 29, 2014, 07:21:26 AM by Furry-Sneezes »
Google Translate only for giant text!
Now I'm almost proficient! \o/ (took 8 years tho)

Offline sneezyserpent

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Re: [F+Story] The ice sneezing
« Reply #1 on: January 29, 2012, 09:16:57 PM »
Your English isn't that bad in this story! Its actually really well done N@ndo ;D That ice dragoness causing trouble without meaning to...I feel sorry for her but at the same time...;D

Anyway, great story!! I did enjoy this, and the way you described her need to sneeze is both funny and original ^^. English is a very hard language to learn, and for this being your first story, this was amazing!

Offline oneofthree

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Re: [F+Story] The ice sneezing
« Reply #2 on: January 30, 2012, 11:59:11 PM »
It was interesting to read a story with Portugese grammar and English words.  I liked it.
Feel free to give me a message sometime.  I'm almost always up for a little RPing, or story ideas.
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Offline megacycle

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Re: [F+Story] The ice sneezing
« Reply #3 on: January 31, 2012, 01:48:49 PM »
"I liked it." said Axel Spitfire.

He offers Free a handkerchief.
I've got nothing important to say. I just wanted to type something in this box of my profile. I'm an egg short of a dozen. A puzzle without all the pieces. I'm crazy.

Offline sneezyserpent

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Re: [F] Ice Sneezing*
« Reply #4 on: September 28, 2014, 03:43:38 AM »
I still remember this :). I still enjoy it too ^^. I think it's fun and I like it. Character personality shows a lot in this short story.